Wednesday, March 5, 2008

My First One!

Today, I am thankful for the technology that allowed me to "work remotely". I was too much of a wimp to head out into the snow and spend 4 ½ hours driving to work, so I emailed my boss and told him I was working from home. What I didn't tell him was that the Twins game was on TV. I'm so sly.

This is my first televised game since I started this blog, so I'm not quite sure what to do. But I am going to have fun.

I have a habit of talking directly to the television during games because I know they can hear me. They don't always listen to me, but they can hear me. Here's a recap of the conversations I had during the game:

1st inning:
(To Rick Suttcliff when he's talking about Morneau) Morn-yo? Dude, it's not Morn-yo.

(To Derek Jeter when he's taking his sweet time getting a new bat and doing his usual "human-rain-delay" routine) Yes, Jeter. The camera's on you. Take your time and get your pretty face on air as long as possible.

(To Kevin Slowey) Striking out Giambi is a beautiful thing.

2nd inning:
(To Brendan Harris when he missed that ground ball) Nicky would have got that. We should combine the two of you - Nickdan Puntis.

(To both ESPN guys when they're going on and on about A-Rod's previous at-bat) Oh, for crying out loud, he walked last inning. That doesn't make him God.

3rd inning:
(To ESPN as a whole) Stop showing film of Johan. It's old now.

(To Gardy as he's being interviewed) You can sure tell it's spring training. You're usually much more uptight during the season.

(To ESPN as a whole) Heaven forbid you guys show a graphic or tell us who's up to bat. Who is that, Mike Lamb? Wait, no, it's ... hmm, got me.

5th inning:
(To Garrett Jones)BOOM!

(To Joba Chamberlain when he beans Matt Tolbert in the ankle)Hey! Hey! Hey! A pox on your ankle.

6th inning:
(To Justin during his interview) Hi honey. Nice to see you smiling so much in an interview. And you've been practicing avoiding all the "ums" and "likes". Nice job. Way to come out of your Canadian shell.

7th inning:
(To the ESPN guy) It's "Pridie", NOT "Perdie"

8th inning:
(To Alejandro Machado when he doubled and drove in two) ALE-JANDRO!

9th inning:
(To Everyone) YAY! Twins win!

So that's that. Good Guys 7, Evil Empire 5

Cheers to

Because you drove in the go-ahead runs, and your name is fun to say.

Boo-hiss to: Joba.

Dude, calm down. It's spring training for crissakes. No need to be plunking people just cuz someone hit a homer off you.

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