Is JJ Hardy "Injury Prone"? (With Paper Dolls!)

Editorial note: I had this post about 2/3 done when rumors of the Twins trading JJ to the Orioles started flying hot and heavy on Wednesday. But, since I've been cooking this in my head for about a week and a half, I figured I'd still go with it. So there's a very good chance that this article will be moot and worthless in 24 hours, but hey, any chance I get to break out my paper dolls, I'm going for it.

K-bro's 2010 JJ Hardy Injury Paper Doll
I find myself defending JJ Hardy a lot lately. Especially since there are rumors that he's possibly being shopped as a trade candidate. I want to keep him around. I think he's a great defensive shortstop and he's decent offensively. But several of my friends tell me that they wouldn't be sad to see him go because he "can't stay healthy" and he's "injury-prone."

Really? I knew he missed a lot of time due to that nagging wrist injury that was caused by a freak event, but I never really considered him "injury-prone." Let's examine.

First, I need to define "injury-prone." How the hell do I know? I've never spent more than 15 minutes willingly on an athletic field of play in my life. So, I did the most logical thing; I asked my Twitter friends.

The responses I got were quite varied: everything from "unlucky" to "Eric Bedard" to "unwilling to play hurt" to "managed by Dusty Baker" (that one made me laugh). But I'll go with Andrew's (@Bryz_OffTheMark): "I'd probably say one significant injury per year for 3+ years where 'significant' means spending more than 15 days on the DL." This definition is good because it excludes players who have a bad-luck injury that hurts them for only one season, such as Justin Morneau and his concussion (hopefully it's only the one year). It also excludes "achy" players who need an extra day or two here and there, but that sitting out time doesn't really hurt the team, such as Jim Thome. So under Andrew's definition, Joe Crede comes immediately to mind. Remember him?

K-bro's 2009 Joe Crede Paper Doll

JJ's 2010 injuries consisted of a migraine, sore or swollen knee, turf toe, and that poor wrist. Over the previous three years, he's reportedly missed games because of back spasms (4 in '09, 3 in '07), collarbone injury (1 in '09), a rotator cuff injury (5 in '08), a hip flexor injury (1 in '07), and a stomach virus (2 in '07) for a total of 16 games, which is not significant, and nothing DL-worthy. Additionally, the turf toe (which is a lot more painful that it's silly name implies -- it's pretty much a ligament strain under the big toe) was listed as an ongoing injury, "I played probably half my games last year with the same problem, so it's not a big deal," but he only missed one game because of it, so he is willing to play hurt.

So it's got to be that wrist, right? The wrist is what everyone is thinking of when they're complaining about JJ's heartiness (Hardy's heartiness?). But can he really be labeled "injury-prone" because of that? He jammed it by sliding innocently, feet-first, into third base after smacking a lovely triple. I'm no expert, because I've never slid into any base in any fashion ever, but looking at it didn't seem out of the ordinary -- guys put their hands down as they slide to keep the upper halves of their bodies from hitting the ground. He's probably slid like that thousands of times. It was just a freak occurrence that he wouldn't be able to do again if he tried. The unfortunate part was that it was especially stubborn to heal. A cortisone shot and a trip to the DL just didn't do it. Apparently either he or the team, or both, rushed him back too quickly, it flared up again, and he needed even more time on the DL for the second trip.

Does this one, obstinate injury make him injury-prone? I don't think so. If he still has problems with it next season, or if it happens again, maybe, but even then I'm not convinced. Yes, it was frustrating how much time he missed, but, if anything, I'd call him "slow to heal" (I totally get that -- I'm "slow to heal" too). However, after a restful off-season, there's no reason to believe it'll hold him back in 2011.

And, hey, isn't it great that I found some real clothes for the JJ paper doll rather than the body-paint uni I had for Joe's?

~~~

My tweet above inspired Nick Nelson of Nick's Twins Blog to explore the Myth of Injury Prone using JJ as an example. Be sure to check it out; it's a good read.

My Joe Crede Paper Doll

Poor Joe Crede. He's out of the lineup again with a sore back. We all knew when the Twins signed him that he would be sitting out sometimes because of that twice-surgically-repaired back -- especially since they're asking him to play on Field Turf. And, to be honest, I'm not at all disappointed or frustrated with the amount of time he has to take off due to his back.

However, his other body parts are giving him grief. Everything from his right hand swelling due to being hit by a pitch to his ankle turning as he ran the bases. To his credit though, he hasn't landed on the DL.

So I made this awesome paper doll that demonstrates all the ouchies and other issues that have kept him out of the lineup. Wow, it kind of looks like his left leg is totally going to fall off. I just kinda threw in the "Little Bundle of Joy" thing; I'm not saying that he shouldn't have left the team for that.

You gotta admit, the skin-tight uni is pretty sweet. How very 1978.

Now, I'm not complaining at all about the amount of time he's missed. I just feel bad that so many different aches and pains are getting the best of him. And to be clear, I really, really, really want to love Crede. It's so nice to have a real third baseman. His defense is generally fantastic. And his bat's pretty good, too. But, I'm afraid to become too attached because chances are he's going to be gone after this year. This is why I haven't given him a nickname yet.

I'm just glad I'm not making a paper doll for Adrian Beltre.

Embarrassing Much?

Seriously? Did that really just happen? You mean this stinking awful rotten series wasn't a horrible nightmare? Yikes.

Recap:
Monday: Do you even want to know? Ugly ugly ugly.
Tuesday: Twins 3 - A's 2
Wednesday: Even uglier than Monday's

Ok, so it's over. Put it in the past.

Besides, I don't have anything to say that wouldn't be incredibly depressing or offensive (Hi Mom!). So I'll just leave it alone.

~~~

Well, wait. I do want to say something about the series. I have some thoughts about The Play. You know The Play -- the one at home plate with Cuddyer, and the bad call, and the resulting punch in the proverbial gut? Well, I don't actually want to talk about The Play; I want to talk about The Fallout From The Play.

Gardy wants baseball to adopt a "red flag" ruling like football has -- a way to announce to the officials that the manager begs to differ with the call and would like them to take a look at the film. I don't agree. Nope, not at all.

I'm against instant-replay, and I have been for a long time. I am willing to tolerate the current homerun-or-not-fair-or-foul replay baseball has -- there aren't umpires at the fair poles, and it might be hard to see that far away. However, I really can't stand the thought of any more possible instances.

I know the idea of IR is to "get the call right." However, there is every reason to believe that a play at home plate, where an umpire resides the whole game, will be called correctly 99.9% of the time. In this particular case, the umpire was out of position to make a good call. His bad. Yeah, I'm mad at him, and he should probably be disciplined for the gaffe, but in reality, he screwed up -- nothing more. And nothing more should be made of it. Who hasn't messed up the job? (No, please don't ask my boss if I have. He might enjoy relating those stories too much.)

It's understandable to react like Gardy did. But the true test would be to ask him if the tables were turned and we WON on a blown call, would he feel the same way. I can't speak for him, but I kind of doubt it.

~~~

Keeping Up on the Bull Pen Revolving Door:

After Wednesday's game, Kevin Mulvey was sent down and Jesse Crain was called back up.

Oh, it sounds like Joe Crede and/or Glen Perkins might land on the DL. There seems to be a shoulder virus going around.

It Wasn't Pretty...

...but any time the Twins take 2 of 3 from the Evil Ugly White Sox, I'll take it.

Recap:

Friday: Twins 6 - EUWS 4
Saturday: Twins 7 - EUWS 8
Sunday: Twins 13 - EUWS 7

So the Twins scored 26 runs in three games for an average of 8.6 runs per. Yay!

But they gave up 19 for an average of 6.3 per. Meh.

If the goal is to score 4 or more and give up 3 or fewer runs per game, our boys only met it halfway. Psst! Hey pitchers, here's a hint: give up fewer runs. 'K? Thanks.

But I can't say I'm disappointed by this series. In fact, I'm comfortably pleased. I did enjoy all the home run hitting. Hats off to Joe Crede for his two on Saturday, and to Denard, Go-Go, and Harris for theirs on Sunday. What fun! And I especially love it that Go-G0 owns Mark Buehrle (have I mentioned that I don't like Mark Buehrle?)!

~~~

On Saturday, I attended the First (hopefully Annual - or more frequently than that) Twins Fan/Blogger/Twitterers Get-Together. A big thanks to Jen (Baseball & Lipgloss) for hosting it at her home. (BTW - I absolutely fell in love with her dog Zeppelin. He is such a sweetie! And I don't even like dogs, but he stole my heart.)

It was very nice to finally meet Sarah (Oh, It's THOSE Girls). I've read her blog for awhile, and I've enjoyed every word, I feel like I've known her for a long time. It was also very nice to meet Amanda from ESPN's Play Ball podcast (she flew in from NY to come to the party). And it was fun meeting everyone else who came.

After the party we went to the game. I was thrilled to see Brad Radke's induction into the Twins Hall of Fame (he was my first real Baseball Boyfriend). I wasn't as thrilled that the Twins lost, but it was fun at the end with the almost-come-back.

Our seats were behind home plate, but way up there in the upper deck.



But I was happy that I got my Twins HOF Pins. Also, I don't think it was a coincidence that Joe Crede was on my scorecard and then he hits two home runs for me.



And here's Brad Radke giving his speech. He was very gracious and thankful. I liked that when he was done and the fans were giving him a standing ovation, he was applauding the fans right back.


(Yup, that's the good old camera lens shoved into the binoculars eye technique. Whatever works.)

~~~

So now it's the All Star break. I hope the boys have a good time relaxing, hanging out with their families and friends, fishing, golfing, bowling, deep-sea diving, whatever.

And good luck to Joey, Joe, and Justin at the All Star Game. Go get 'em. And best of luck to Joey in the Home Run Derby. Hit lots and lots of homers, but don't ruin that swing. ;-)

Well, It Was Split Road Trip

One of the old adages in sports states that you'll have a good season if you play well at home and close to .500 on the road.

Well, by taking the Cubs series, the Twins finally had a .500 road trip. I know that they have a lot of making up to do to actually get to .500 on the road. But hey...baby steps.

Recap:
Friday: Twins 7 - Cubs 4
Saturday: Twins 2 - Cubs 0
Sunday: Twins 2 - Cubs 3

Twins take series.

It was a busy weekend, so I missed a lot of Friday's and Saturday's games. Most of what I do know about those games, I heard about after the fact.

I did watch most of Sunday's game, but it was really weird -- in fact, it was annoying. The audio from WFTC kept cutting out, and when we could hear it, it was out of sync -- we could hear the bat hit the ball well before we could see it. The whole thing gave me a really bad feeling for the entire game.

Here are the few things I actually know about this series:

• Milton Bradley needs an abacus when he's playing out in right-field so he can count how many outs there are. He's lucky it was a harmless gaffe.
  
• Saying "Joe, no interesting" to Joe Nathan while looking at the radio isn't as effective as saying it while looking at the TV. He, indeed, made it "interesting" on Saturday while I was speaking to the radio in hubby's pickup. Fortunately, he's pretty good at his job and knows what to do.
  
• Carlos Gomez really can hit a homerun. Now that that's over with, maybe he'll relax and stop swinging for the fences every time he bats.
  
• Joe Mauer is a really good hitter. Yeah, I know I didn't really learn that during this series, but he did a nice job of reminding me.

Up next: an off day, then the Pirates at home.

Also, I'm sending all the Get Well Mo-Jo I can muster and send it to Cuddy's hand; D-Span's head; Creeedeee's back, knee, leg, shoulder, wrist, forearm, or whatever else hurts; and any sore body parts to any Twins players who need it.

Moments

*Sigh* Another split series. And that final game was a real bummer. Oh well, it's not so bad.

Recap:
Monday: Twins 3 - A's 4
Tuesday: Twins 10 - A's 5
Wednesday: Twins 6 - A's 3
Thursday: Twins 3 - A's 4

This series was odd. Every time the Twins took a lead in a game, and they had early leads in all of them, I just didn't feel comfortable (ok, I felt a little comfortable when we headed into the 9th on Tuesday leading 10-0...right up until Scotty walked that first batter).

There were fantastic moments, like Morneau's and Kubel's homers on Tuesday. There were some dreadful moments, like the 9th inning on Tuesday.

There were solid moments, like the bullpen innings on Wednesday. There were shaky moments, like Swarzak's innings on Monday.

There were gleeful moments, like Crede's homer on Thursday. There were heartbreaking moments, like the 8th and 9th innings on Thursday.

~~~~~~~~~~

Up next: the Cubbies! I hope the Twins have a good time there and pull out a couple wins. And pitchers hitting -- I love that.

Regarding Sweeps, HBPs, and New Guys

I love a good sweep when it's my team doing the cleaning up.

Recap
Friday: Twins 11 - Brewers 3
Saturday: Twins 6 - Brewers 2
Sunday: Twins 6 - Brewers 3

And a lot of Twins going Boom!

I'm especially impressed with Justin's grand-slam on Sunday because it came immediately after Milwaukee pitcher hit his second Twins Joe in the hands (both Joe Crede and Joe Mauer were HBP, and Crede had to take himself out of the game because of it). Gotta love how the big Canadian makes a statement. I hope both Joes' hands will be ok.

Oh, and Gardy actually won an argument with an umpire. When Joey Mauer got hit by the pitch, the umpire initially called it a foul ball. Joe showed the bruise, and Gardy marched out to make the case. Well, apparently, either the bruise or Gardy's power of persuasion won the umpire over, and Joe took his base.

~~~~~~~~

No one in my family is quite as, ahem, passionate about baseball as I am, but they generously put up with me. They all actually have lives that don't include the Twins (I don't get it), and they don't really watch the games with me all that often. They're fans, but they don't live and die with every victory and defeat. And they don't really spend time keeping up with the news of injuries, releases, and call-ups.

So, this weekend as I was watching the Twins games and members of my family were walking through the room, the phrase I heard most was, "now, who's this guy?" It would happen while a newly called-up pitcher was warming up or pitching. I heard it a lot.

So, in case your families are like mine and don't know what's going on with the pitching staff, here's a recap:

Glen Perkins is on disabled list, so...
Sean Henn (or Henny-Penny as the guys at Pulling a Blyleven and I have dubbed him) is in the bullpen and pitched on Tuesday against the White Sox and was seen warming up Saturday.

Craig Breslow was placed on waivers and picked up by Oakland, so...
Anthony Swarzak pitched a seven-inning gem on Saturday (I think he looks like a keeper).

Got it?

So, Like, Wow

So what's up with the Twins' bats? No, I mean I love it; I'm just a bit amazed.

Recap:
Tuesday: Twins 6 - Tigers 2
Wednesday: Twins 14 - Tigers 10 (13)
Thursday: Twins 6 - Tigers 5

Twins earn sweep

I barely recognize this team. Haven't we always been told that this team is built on pitching and "small ball"? So what's with all this hitting and big innings and homers and such? Let me just say that I love it and I want them to keep it up.

I would, however, like to recommend that the pitchers, particularly the bullpen pitchers, pull there heads out of their as...er, the sand. How awesome would that be?

And our hero again today was Joe Crede (who, by the way, must have been running on nothing but intestinal fortitude and Java Monster Mean Bean). No dramatic walk-off grannies today, only a nice, timely two-run single, but he sure seems to like to show off when the bases are loaded. So, I think it would be great if Gardy dared the batters in front of Joe to always get on base for him just to see him show off some more. Do you think that's a good idea?

Bartender, I'd Like to Buy a Beer For...

Joe Crede

Thanks Joe. After a long night of leading, then trailing, then leading, then trailing, then tied, then trailing, then tied (I think that's how that went), YOU decided, "enough of that noise," and then made some noise to finally put an end to this agonizing game once and for all. Yes, you had some help, with all those guys on base and all, but that (say it with me now) Walk-off Grand Slam in the bottom of the 13th (GAWD!) was decisive, and timely, and beautiful.

Try to get some sleep now. It's an early game tomorrow. Night-night.

[EDIT:] I moseyed on over to the free agent board on my fantasy team, and lo and behold, one Mr. Joe Crede was available. Hmmm. Turns out I need to drop Carlos Guillen (he's on the DL and my DL is full), so I snapped him up. Too bad I didn't think to do that two days ago, but whatev. Don't worry, it's only on a trial basis; if being on my fantasy baseball team proves to give him bad luck, I'll be able to easily drop him and add a different 3B.

A Great Mother's Day!

I took my mom to a Twins game to celebrate Mother's Day (Hi Mom!). Even though the game didn't turn out exactly the way we hoped, it was still a great day.

Recap:
Friday: Twins 11 - Mariners 0
Saturday: Twins 9 - Mariners 6
Sunday: Twins 3 - Mariners 5
Twins take series 2 - 1

We were both so excited to be at the game together -- we were looking forward to it all week -- there was no way we were going to let anything spoil the day. Not even an awful 8th inning by the bullpen.

During the game, there were a pair of women sitting behind us (I guessed them to be mother and daughter, but if that was true, the "mother" was very young-looking). At first, they seemed to be having a nice time. I didn't really listen in on their conversations, but the bits I did hear made it seem that they were very knowledgeable Twins fans. Well during and after that Awful 8th Inning (I capitalize because that its name), they suddenly turned very bitter and wicked. They went on and on (I won't get into it here -- I can't imagine having that much negativity in my heart). And they weren't being sarcastic and exaggerate-y like a regular fan is when watching the bullpen cough up a lead; they were vile and poisonous and mean. They weren't loud, just intense. The kicker was when they both said, "this just ruined Mother's Day." And they meant it. Seriously? You're going to let one bad inning in a baseball game ruin your Mother's Day? Wow. That's some family dysfunction right there, I tell ya.

So, to shake off all that bad karma, and to prove that I really did have a great day (Hi Mom!), I'll list the Great things and the Bummer things to show what's better. 'k? 'k.

Great:

• Having breakfast with Mom (Thanks Mom!).
• Getting to the game nice and early to get a decent parking spot.
• Buying and eating warm cinnamon almonds.
  
• Getting to the game nice and early to get a sweet t-shirt.
• Getting to the game nice and early to visit with my mom (Hi Mom!).
• Getting to the game nice and early to use my binoculars to watch Joe Crede stretch out that hamstring before the game.
• Listening to that high-school choir perform the National Anthem (really -- they were good).
• Using my binoculars to watch Blackie.
• Watching Justin beat Ichiro to the bag in the 1st.
• Watching Go-Go go-go on that bunt single in the 2nd.
  
• Willing Blackie through trouble in the 4th and watching him successfully get out of it.
• Listening to that lady sing God Bless America during the 7th inning stretch (again really -- she was very good).
• Watching Go-Go go-go get that fly to center in the 9th.
• Cheering and clapping and shouting and crossing our fingers when our boys loaded the bases in the 9th (too bad it didn't turn out the way we were wishing, but it was still fun).
• Getting to the ladies restroom after the game but before the line got long (hey, sometimes it's the little things in life).
• Having a nice dinner at my favorite Mexican restaurant with my husband and boys (Thanks Guys!).

Bummers:

• Watching the Awful 8th Inning.
• Listening to those chicks bitch about the Awful 8th Inning.
• Smacking my nose really hard with a laundry basket (don't ask).

That's about it. Yup, it looks like I had a resoundingly great Mother's Day. I hope my mom did too (Hi Mom!).

Catching Up on My E-mails

After spending Easter with my family, I decided to catch up on my e-mails. Since it was a busy holiday weekend, I'll have to back-date some of them.

~~~~

Date: Friday, April 10, 2009
To: RADickey@mntwins.com
From: kbro@kbrobaseball.com
Subj: Sox (and Socks)

R.A.,
Admirable work, especially in that wind. It was a little un-pretty at times, but you wiggled yourself out of some jams. I hope you can stay on the team when Scotty gets back.

Oh, I love the high socks.

~~~~

Date: Friday, April 10, 2009
To: JMorales@mntwins.com
From: kbro@kbrobaseball.com
Subj: Catching the Knuckleballer

Jose,
Nice work. You did way better than I thought you would. Next time I see you, remind me to give you a pat on the back.

~~~~

Date: Friday, April 10, 2009
To: JCrede@mntwins.com
From: kbro@kbrobaseball.com
Subj: Your Homerun

Joe,
Thanks for remembering which team you play for now.

~~~~

Date: Friday, April 10, 2009
To: PABooth@uscellularfield.com
From: kbro@kbrobaseball.com
Subj: Joe Crede's "Walk Up" Music

Air Supply and Patrick Swayze? That was pretty funny.

~~~~

Date: Friday, April 10, 2009
To: ACasilla@mntwins.com; MCuddyer@mntwins.com; CGomez@mntwins.com
From: kbro@kbrobaseball.com
Subj: Your Cute Turtle Neck Hoody UnderArmour Things

Adorable! I'm sorry you were so cold, but you did look pretty cute.

~~~~

Date: Friday, April 10, 2009
To: batters@mntwins.com
From: kbro@kbrobaseball.com
Subj: Lots of Runs

I love lots of runs. I think all baseball fans love lots of runs from their home boys. But I fear you may have used them all up for the weekend. I worry that you may need them for Saturday and Sunday. I wish there were such a thing as a "Run Bank."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Date: Saturday, April 11, 2009
To: FLiriano@mntwins.com
From: kbro@kbrobaseball.com
Subj: Strike Zone

Franchise,
Dude! Walking in two runs in an inning is not a good thing. Everyone would prefer it if you pitched for strikes instead of pitching for power. Please work on that.

~~~~

Date: Saturday, April 11, 2009
To: BColon@chiwhitesox.com
From: kbro@kbrobaseball.com
Subj: Your Pitching Performance

Bartolo,
You looked great. But I'm afraid that had little to do with you. It seems that the Twins batters simply made you look good. Don't get used to it; it won't happen again.

~~~~

Date: Saturday, April 11, 2009
To: batters@mntwins.com
From: kbro@kbrobaseball.com
Subj: Runs

Guys,
Remember what I said yesterday about banking runs? Today would have been a good time to use some of them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Side note: I was not allowed to watch the Twins game on Sunday. I was told "There are 150-something Twins games left this season; there's only one Masters." Fair enough.

Date: Sunday, April 12, 2009
To: PMickelson@masters.com
From: kbro@kbrobaseball.com
Subj: Your Putting

Phil,
I really wish you were better at putting. I do enjoy watching golf from time to time, but I can't say that I'm really a fan of yours. However, none of that really matters. What matters is that I had an exhausting weekend, and I was taking a little snooze on the couch while the whole fam was watching the Masters. I don't get many chances to snooze, so when I do, it's precious. So, I was snoozing, and the family was watching, and you were golfing, and then you missed that stupid putt by this >-< much. Now, normally that wouldn't bother me. Except the entire family let out a collective OOHHH really loud, thereby waking me up and scaring the crap out of me. If you would've made that putt, everyone probaly would've nodded or muttered gently, which would've allowed me to sleep. Try to be more considerate next time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Recap:
Friday: Twins 12 - Evil Ugly White Sox 5
Saturday: Twins 0 - EUWS 8
Sunday: Twins 1 - EUWS 6

Is This Gonna Be Great or What?

Ok, so I'm sitting here, and first pitch is just about to happen. I'm so excited, I just agreed to allow my son to get a tattoo of the Twins logo if they win the World Series. And I promise that I'll follow through with it, too.

So I think it'll be a good year. It'll certainly be an interesting division race. None of the so-called experts can agree with their predictions on how the teams will end up. I've heard predictions that the Twins will be anywhere from first to fourth. I've also heard predictions that any of the five teams (even the Royals) will win the division. I know what I predict....

Oh, and Morneau was soo safe!

It'll also be interesting to see if Joe Crede turns out to be the "missing piece" everyone says he is. I'll give him a month or so before I bestow him with any nicknames or anything.

Crappola, the Mariners scored. Ok Franchise, settle down.

Oh, and Happy Birthday Bert! Let's hope you get what you want -- it's what all of Twins Territory wants -- a Twins win.

I'm excited because I've already got one baseball road trip planned. I hold in my hands...tickets to see the Cardinals host the Twins (ok, I don't literally have them in my hands -- it would be awfully hard to type if did -- but I do have them in my possession). I'm really looking forward to that. I've been to St. Louis before, and I like it.

Oh come on Cuddy! Why did you take that pitch?

I'm also excited because I have tickets for the final regular season game in the Dome. I stress regular season because there is always the chance for playoff games, and I don't have tickets for those yet.

AAAARRRGGGHHHH! I guess Griffey's still got it. Rats!

No no no no no no no no no .... Red-Dog... please be ok ... please be ok ... please be ok. Whew, it looks like he's all right. And, with that, all is right wil the world. It seems that it's mandated somewhere in Baseball Olympus that Redmond must get beat up when he plays. Man he's tough, but if Joey doesn't get back soon, there isn't going to be anything left of him.

Crap, crap, crap. Torii would've caught that. Ok boys, now it's time to put some runs on the board.

So apparently, the Twins batters have taken Jim Souhan's Sunday article to heart. Jim said that games are too slow because batters work the count. But this swinging at the first pitch and grounding out isn't doing anybody any good either. So, guys, take a pitch, work the count; let's get into their bullpen, shall we?

*sigh* Well this turned out way uglier than I would've liked. I mean, seriously, getting beat by the lowly Mariners?

Oh well. The beauty of Opening Day is that I can delude myself into believing that it's only one game and it'll still be a great season. It is great to have baseball back.

It's Oh So Close...

As I write this, I am watching House (it just started...it looks like a good episode). At this time next week, I'll be DVRing House and watching Twins Baseball!...REAL, LIVE, IT-COUNTS, TWINS BASEBALL. I can't wait.

I'm very excited -- so excited that my expectations are all jumbled and disjointed and random. As usual, when I get this way, I do bullet points.

• I'm nervous that we're not really considered the underdogs this year. It always seems our boys are at their best when no one expects anything. So everyone needs to do me a favor -- please expect the Twins to come in, oh I don't know, third place this year. Thanks.
  
• I'm not really worried about Joey's sore bum. He'll be ship-shape pretty soon.
  
• I am a little worried that while Red's filling in for Joey, he'll get the crap beat out of him, because he always gets the crap beat out of him when he's behind the plate.
• Every time Kevin Slowey pitched this spring, he made me like him a little more because he's so awesome. And then today, he was a guest on the Twins radio broadcast, and he was so talkative and interesting and gracious and knowledgeable, it just made my day listening to him. I don't know, but I think he elevated his status to my second-favorite starting pitcher. A very close second-favorite at that.
  
• I am curious to see how the White Sox fans will greet Joe Crede on that first road trip to Chicago. I hope they don't boo him -- I never understood that.
• I am really looking forward to watching the Twins games in HD. My family got a nice HD TV last December. I've watched football and golf in HD, and I think it's awesome. But I haven't watched baseball in HD yet. I bet that'll be even awesome-er.
• I'm still pulling for R.A. Dickey to break camp with the team because I'm still intrigued by the idea of having a knuckleballer on the team -- especially in the Dome.
• Speaking of the Dome, I have procured tickets for the last regular-season game in the Dome. I expect tears.
• I'm equal parts amused and irritated by the news that there is someone in the MLB headquarters who has decided that D-Span wears his pants too sloppy. Riiiight...talk to me when you start warning Manny about his sloppy pants.
  

So, I just need a bit more patience...I've been waiting since October, I can wait one more week.

Oh, and House was good. The preview for next week's episode looks good too. Thank goodness for my DVR.

Welcome Crede, and Enjoying Classic Scotty

So Bill Smith really is alive. It must have been the warm Florida sun that woke him up. Perhaps he's like those iguanas that go into mini-comas when it's cold, and then are just fine when it warms up again (although you'd think we would've heard something if he had actually fallen out of a tree).

And not only is he awake, but he's apparently ruthless. He got Joe Crede for a really, really good deal. He did not cave when Crede's agent, Scott Boras (who has been compared to Beelzebub himself), reportedly requested $7 million base salary plus incentives. In fact, Smith said, "No! And just for thinking that, you'll accept $2.5 million base plus incentives that total no more than $7 million. And you'll like it!" And Crede and Boras said, "Sir! Yes sir!"

All this might be an indication that Crede really wanted to come to the Twins (it might also mean that he didn't really have any other options, but I prefer to believe the former). Well, I, for one, am glad to have him.

Welcome to the Minnesota Twins, Joe Crede.

Photo from mlb.com/credit Getty Images

Could you do me a favor though? I know it's been a long off-season and all, but just in case you happen to have any White Sox stench still on you, would you mind terribly if I asked you to take one of those decontamination haz-mat showers? We can't be too careful; you're one of the good guys now.


Photo from Getty Images

Oh, and another thing...could you please stay healthy? I mean, if you can't, it'll probably be ok because we still have Brian Buscher. But I think it'd just be best for everyone if you went ahead and earned that $7 million. If it'll help, I'd be happy to send you a case of Doan's Pills.



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As I was writing this, FSN aired a classic Twins game from August '07 -- Scott Baker's near-perfect game against the Royals. It made me smile. In fact, I was sitting here cheering as I was watching it for the first time. I'm such a dork.

So, to celebrate his awesome pitching performance, I'll upload his picture.


Nice work, Scotty.